abruptness invades repeatedly

our senior batch of pharmacy P107 cohort had already landed in glasgow 2 months ago. though didn't manage to know them, yet it's still a delight to read through their episodes of journey abroad. all the fun they had while making trips to different european countries in a bunch. living together cosily in hostels, all cramped up in the tiny pantry for dinner preparation. yet, speaking of looking forward to these days, i doubted a second. do i really long for the day to leave my home just because i wanted to experience things they've experienced, or is it merely just a random thought of the chance to be in a foreign country, away from home, away from my family chaos, away from the people i wanted to be away from.

one year's time, all i have is exactly one year's time to contemplate on how i'm going to live my days ahead. with addition to the elevated workload from next semester onwards, one year is never enough for a virgo like me who thinks too much on every detail. i'm worried, very worried, if i'll be in terrible homesick condition, whether or not i'll adapt living with friends, food and locals over in scotland, and, if i'll be able to fully withdraw the past feelings.

some would say that leaving home equals to making a new start ahead. to me, i'll just see it as another half glass to be filled. i see it as an end to all aggravations. i never deny that i am the kind who constantly sees the pros of everything fresh. some might categorise me as 贪新忘旧, i admit. if you have been through what i am going through now, perhaps you'll take that back.

i had always liked and tried to be different from others. i see things in different perspectives, i hate being in the shadow of someone else. i dislike myself being masked or being made comparisons to others. no, i do not mean that i want to be dominant in every aspects, i'm just loathing about the fact of being made equal. i am me in my own way. you can brand me with the statement of being exceptionally self-centred, i don't care, but please don't make me mask myself as the protagonists just because that's the norm.

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just recently i've been so flickr-dicted. like my friend said, sometimes you just wanted to have an escapade to a foreign place, bagging only basic necessaties and most important of all, my ipod and camera. one can hardly not have the sudden rush of travelling upon sighting the scenic landscapes of those european settings on flickr.

that night, i had this visualization of a lone-trip to some of the victorian cities, be it Milan, Vienna, Budapest, just somewhere out of the concrete jungle. somewhere i could witness the grandeur architectures and cultures dated back over 3-4 centuries ago. sipping a cup of latte by the streets, glimpsing at the bypassers, savouring the smells of the floral markets, breathing in some stress-free air. i wanted to make this a mono-travel. i just want to plug on my earphones and stroll down these streets, reminiscing the past, envisioning the future. there'll always be someone i'll think of, i don't know if this sounds silly, but i guess that is the only way to make a lone-trip not feeling alone. :)



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anyway, there's this current 10.2 MP nikon D3000 entry level model i'm eyeing on now. price yet to be announced for the malaysia market, but it is selling at USD600 elsewhere. so i'm guessing that it'll come up to about RM2000 here. just fits in my budget for a slr. anyone, anyone out there generous enough to sponsor the aspiring amateur? :P